Monk In The World

To be a monk is to have time to practice for your transformation and healing. And after that to help with the transformation and healing of other people.

Thich Nhat Hanh

Sunday, December 30, 2012

A Cross I Can Embrace

What follows is a summary of sorts by Richard Rhor about his discussion of many of the "theologies of the cross" in the book sited here at the end of the post. I highly recommend this book for those who are willing to think for themselves with a critical mind about their faith but beware, it will challenge much of what has been passed down to you. I find here a cross I can truly embrace. This theology of Duns Scotus makes much more sense to me than a loving God who requires blood in order for me to have a relationship with him/her.
To get the full import of what is being said here you may need to read the book.

A Bit of History 

In the thirteenth century, the 

Franciscans and the Dominicans 

were the church’s debating 

society, as it were. We were 

allowed to have minority 

positions in those day, which 

makes me think we have moved 

backward. We invariably took 

opposing positions in the great 

debates in the universities of 

Paris, Cologne, and Oxford, and neither opinion was kicked out of the church in those days. One of the debates was on St. Anselm’s famous and influential writing, Cur Deus Homo? (“ Why did God become a human being?”). St. Thomas Aquinas and the Dominicans were being true to the Scriptures, many of which give you the impression that a ransom has to be paid to someone, and that atonement has to be made to God. They were just being faithful to Jewish temple metaphors of sacrifice, price, and atonement. But our Franciscan teacher Blessed John Duns Scotus, who established the theological chair at Oxford, said that Jesus wasn’t solving any problems with God. Jesus wasn’t changing God’s mind about us but, rather, he was changing our mind about God. Scotus built his argument much more on Colossians’ and Ephesians’ understanding of the preexistent Cosmic Christ. Jesus is “the image of the invisible God,” who came forward in a moment of time so we could look upon “the One we have pierced” and see God’s unconditional love— and at the same time see what humans do to almost everything— and then witness God and Jesus’ unconditional love-response to that. The image of the cross was to change us, not to change God, andso Scotus concluded that Jesus’ incarnation and death were not at all necessary:

Jesus was a pure gift, and the 

realm of gift is much better than 

the realm of necessity. We were 

not saved because of any problem 

whatsoever, or to pay any debt to 

devil or to God, but purely to 

reveal to the soul Divine Love. As 

usual, the Franciscans were 

right, but unfortunately we lost 

the debate, and the mainline 

Dominican position has been 

held by most Catholics and 

Protestants to this day, with a lot 

of sad results. Someone called it 

“the most unfortunately 

successful piece of Christian 

theology ever written,” because 

it implied that God was not 

naturally and unconditionally in 

love with what God created.

Rohr, Richard (2012-06-11). Lever and a Place to Stand, A: The Contemplative Stance, the Active Prayer (Kindle Locations 1274-1278). Paulist Press. Kindle Edition. 

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Merry Christmas

Dear Family and Friends,

Brother David has been one of my mentors in my journey for several years. Like myself, he too has studied the Way of Zen, while maintaining his Christian identity.
Here are his thoughts about this season, taken from the website

A meaningful season to all who seek truth.


A Christmas Letter from Br. David Steindl-Rast

Monday, Dec. 24
Dear Reader,
This year i have the privilege to celebrate Christmas once more at a small monastery in a lovely lake region of my native Austria. In these surroundings and especially at this festive season i am surrounded by images from the Christian tradition. As in the days of my childhood, their language speaks to me and makes all my senses tingle with joy.

But nowadays i cannot help remembering that many people no longer understand that language. Can it be translated into a different idiom to make the insights and experiences it contains accessible? But then i realize: images need no translation; their language is universal. They speak to anyone who opens eyes and heart.

Central to Christmas is the image of the child. And doesn’t this image speak to every human heart?

How urgently we need the guiding image of the child in a world that has grown old. In one antiphon of the Christmas season we sing: “The old man carries the infant, but the infant guides the old man.” Although this refers to ancient Simeon taking the Christ-child in his arms, it always brings to my mind a little boy riding on the shoulders of his grandfather and guiding him by pulling now one ear, now the other.

Aging can be a process of “saging,” as my revered friend Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi points out, or else it can lead to fear and anxiety. Only a child’s trust can re-direct our fear-ridden society. Paralyzing fear or childlike trust – the choice is ours.

From fear springs violence – yes, not the other way around. Even a tiny mouse will attack when it gets frightened enough and can’t flee. Fear invented wars, weapons, and all the violence weapons can cause – all the way to the recent carnage in Connecticut that makes the mind reel with outrage and sorrow.

From fear springs arrogance – from the frightened toad that inflates itself to impress an aggressor to a display of conspicuous consumption that thinly veils the fear of being outdone by a neighbor.

From fear springs greed – beginning with a sense of scarcity (“Will there be enough for my wants?”) and ending with exploitation and economic collapse.

No wonder, then, that violence, arrogance, and greed disfigure our fearful society. No wonder we long for the world of the fearless child, the world of non-violence, mutual respect, and joyful sharing.

To let the child-in-you guide you – by the ears, if necessary – toward building this new world, this is what i wish you most of all for 2013. It will take courage, strength, and wisdom, but – ”fear not!” – together we can do it. Let us run with grateful joy toward the opportunities a new year holds out to us.

Your brother David

Saturday, December 15, 2012

For The Little Ones



Sunday, November 11, 2012

From Mary Lou Kownacki's

Conversations with Ryokan

Priest Senkei, a true man of the Way!
He worked in silence----no extra words for him.
For thirty years he stayed in Kokusen's community.
He never did meditation, never read the sutras,
And never said a word about Buddhism,
Just worked for the good of all.
I saw him but did not really see him;
I met him but did not really meet him.
Ah, he is impossible to imitate.
Priest Senkei, a true man of the Way!


I read about a woman
Who chose cleaning
As her path
To enlightenment.

Rather than beads,
A toilet brush and broom,
From door to door
And train station, too,
Like a servant
Who had been given an example.

What if...
Instead of sitting with "om"
In my inner-city monastery
I asked my neighbor's permission
And cleaned the sidewalks
Each morning, raking
Leaves, sweeping litter.
Only one block...
One block at a time.

Mary Lou Kownacki

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Life's Prayer Continued...

It seems to me that this spiritual journey (which never ends) has been an effort to understand what it means to make two into one. This has become more evident as I have spent my time in the depths of Soto Zen and Contemplative Christianity. More and more the lines are fading and that field of which Rumi speaks is becoming a reality, at least cognitively but the experience is still Paul’s vision, “for now we see in a mirror dimly...”

Out beyond Ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing
There is a field. I’ll meet you there.

When the soul lies down in that grass,
The world is too full to talk about.
Ideas, language, even the phrase each other doesn’t make any sense.

From Essential Rumi
By Coleman Barks

Bowing to “One”,








Saturday, November 3, 2012



Everything is Waiting for You

Your great mistake is to act the drama
as if you were alone. As if life
were a progressive and cunning crime
with no witness to the tiny hidden
transgressions. To feel abandoned is to deny
the intimacy of your surroundings. Surely,
even you, at times, have felt the grand array;
the swelling presence, and the chorus, crowding
out your solo voice You must note
the way the soap dish enables you,
or the window latch grants you freedom.
Alertness is the hidden discipline of familiarity.
The stairs are your mentor of things
to come, the doors have always been there
to frighten you and invite you,
and the tiny speaker in the phone
is your dream-ladder to divinity.

Put down the weight of your aloneness and ease into
the conversation. The kettle is singing
even as it pours you a drink, the cooking pots
have left their arrogant aloofness and
seen the good in you at last. All the birds
and creatures of the world are unutterably
themselves. Everything is waiting for you.

  -- David Whyte
      from Everything is Waiting for You
     ©2003 Many Rivers Press



 So much close to me, 
Eyes see!
Ears hear!
Tongue taste!
Make love to the moment!
Delicious intimacy!

Monday, October 29, 2012









Sunday, October 21, 2012

Not Knowing Is Most Intimate

I have been reading comments related to a couple of post by Dosho Port over at WildFox Zen. I have come to appreciate my ignorance about the subject matter. It is freeing not to have to get into the fray (which is a healthy fray, by the way) and just go back to the cushion and sit.
I am capable of such frays when it comes to Christian theology and quite often enjoy a good debate about the "God" thing, along with a sip of single malt scotch.
But this place of not knowing truly is most intimate.


To carry yourself forward and experience myriad things is delusion. That myriad things come forth and experience themselves is awakening.

The Genjokoan

Thursday, October 11, 2012


I have been granted the privilege of spending the last three and half days parenting (as a grandparent) along with my wife, my oldest granddaughter Caroline, while my daughter and her husband presented us with a new arrival October 9. 
(Caroline and Lily)
Having to constantly pay attention to the needs of an almost two year old (Ocotober22) is quite instructional in the art of mindfulness.
It is also quite instructional in letting go of what I want to do.
When my first two granddaughters, Caroline and Alice,
(Caroline and Alice)
entered my life I called them heart expanders.
They revealed a part of me that was hidden and I am thankful for that.

What I have noticed over these past few days is how freeing it is to just let go and go with the current of this river called family.

What a wonderful life!

Nothing is permanent. I know this!

I will enjoy all these new flowers in my life and when the seasons change, I hope I can pay attention to that and respond to that change with a grateful heart and an enlightened mind.

They are all such a big part of my practice now.

Bows to these teachers,

And to the other one on the way

Everything is Holy

Caroline Jo Coleman with her new sister Lily Allen Coleman

When all is intimate, all is holy!

Deep Bows,

(Thanks to James over at Monkey Mind for the reminder)

Sunday, September 30, 2012

Sitting Alone

My wife and I spent the weekend in Atlanta. My daughter is expecting our third grandchild and she is due any day now, so we thought we would go up and see if we could be there when it happens. Well, as of right now, it didn't. Her due date is Sunday, according to the "professionals". My wife stayed to give a helping hand and offer her "grandmother mind" to the other child, our oldest grandchild Caroline, whose life will change shortly in a significant way.

As is our habit lately, when we go to visit our children, (both son and daughter live in Atlanta), we try to go to church with the ones we are staying with. This weekend my son's wife and daughter were out of town so he stayed overnight at my daughter's house and we all went to my daughter and son-in-law's church this morning.

It's a very progressive United Methodist church. I'm guessing the average age in that church might be 35 years old. It's the same way at my son's church. There is a generation of young Christians who are trying to reform the church in a new way, it seems to me. And I mean in a good way. They seem to focus on relationships, authenticity, justice, inclusivity and many other "right" things to be if you are going to be the church.

It feels like a de-institutionalizing while remaining an institution.
It's different. It's refreshing. And I'm sure it's not perfect and has and will have it's own problems as it continues to morph into whatever it is this generations is trying to birth.

The point of all this is to share my experience of sitting down while all the others were standing.
I commented to my son and daughter that the last time I went to his church it seemed they stood up for about twenty minutes in the beginning of the service before they ever sat down, indicative of the majority of the age group there. Us "elder" types needed to sit. 

So this morning I decided to take hold of my authority as an "elder" and sit when I felt the need to.
So there I was sitting, and standing right next to me were my son and my pregnant daughter, both looking towards the altar, both singing a hymn together, not knowing their father was sitting there in tears, gratitude running down my cheeks. Here they both were, searching for their truth, worshiping their God...Both "A people of the way", setting aside a sacred time to do one of the most important things that matters to their father - practicing their spirituality.
I was overwhelmed with gratitude that I had two children and a Son-in-law and a daughter-in-law who saw the value of following a spiritual path.

I don't know what part I have played in this. That is not important. If anything I hope I have taught them the value of questioning, of having their own faith, not mine and the value of love and relationships and most importantly, family.

What is God? Who Is God? How is God in our lives?

Who knows?

I do know I sat alone in church today and cried.

For all the right reasons.

Thanks be to God!


Saturday, September 15, 2012


“All one needs is a place to belong, a path to follow and a few friends to keep you sane.”
Lawrence Freeman from Jesus The Teacher Within

This quote is an affirmation for me right now. As I have gotten older, my sense of what my life should look like has become more and more concentrated. 
Some would see it as “small” but that would be a misperception. Being small is quite different from being concentrated. 
Concentrated is rich. Concentrated has a depth that small does not have. Concentrated for me is synonymous too with simplicity.
Knowing where one belongs seems to be, partly, the beginning (the very beginning) of dismantling the ego. Knowing where one belongs is another way of saying learning and accepting who you are. It might well be the authentic life, which sets us free.

Having a path to follow is in some way, no longer looking for all the answers but just walking and enjoying the view, accepting what is presented; a curve in the road, a steep hill, a long flat stretch of road, flowers, weeds, sunshine, rain, snow…all part of the path, the weather of life, seasons, coming and going.
And eventually we return to the earth, only to sprout again in some other form.
From form to formless, to form…the Mystery.
Wood being wood, ash being ash.

To have a few friends to keep you sane is part of being accountable. To have a life companion as part of that small group of friends and a loving family is grace abundant.

All one needs is a place to belong, a path to follow and a few good friends to keep you sane.

Yes, I believe this.


Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Sunday, September 9, 2012

My Mind

Photo credit:

Monkey Mind meditation this morning, all tangled up in the vines of Mu.
My granddaughter Alice understands
What I mean.


Saturday, September 8, 2012


photo credit: Walter Schels, Hamburg

I'm reading an introductory book on Karl Rahner's theology and came across this yesterday morning. I'm just wondering if this is another finger pointing to the same moon. It's my imposed title to this selected piece of writing from the book.

Form and Formlessness in Karl Rahner's Theology?

Another, rather more technical, way in which Rahner often formulates his basic vision of human beings is by means of an opposition between transcendental and categorical experience. Strictly speaking these are not two different experiences but two different dimensions of all our experiencing. We have only one, unified experience, but it has two sides to it. Categorical experience is our experience in so far as it involves us with the finite, with particular real people or objects, with things that can be put into categories, with things to which we can apply concepts, of which we can use language. To transcend means simply ‘to go beyond’, and so our transcendental experience is the experience we have of going beyond all the things which we know and choose and love, even as we are knowing and choosing and loving them: transcendental experience, in Rahner’s words, is the experience which ‘consists precisely in the transcendence beyond any particular group of possible objects or of categories’. And since when we go beyond all the things of this world what we go towards is God, transcendental experience turns out to be, most fundamentally, the experience we have of God in all our ordinary experience. Though transcendental and categorical experiences can be distinguished, they cannot be separated. Rahner insists that transcendental experience does not occur apart from categorical experience – we do not have an experience of God neat, all on its own, but always only in our experiencing of the concrete, categorical realities. Transcendental experience is not, however, just an accompaniment to categorical experience, a kind of added bonus. It does more than just make our ordinary experience a little bit richer. According to Rahner it makes our ordinary experience possible in the first place. Transcendental experience, Rahner maintains, is a condition of the possibility of categorical experience, that without which we would not be able to have any experience at all. There is another, and very important, way in which the two layers in our experience are related. Transcendental experience, Rahner maintains, always needs in some way to articulate itself, to express itself, in categorical experience. By definition, of course, transcendental experience is that realm of experience where language fails, since we have language for objects, for distinguishing one thing from another, but not for that which in principle cannot be an object, not for the infinite horizon within which all this distinguishing takes place: 
The horizon cannot be comprised within the horizon ... The ultimate measure cannot be measured; the boundary which delimits all things cannot itself be bounded by a still more distant limit ... (TI IV 51) And yet, in spite of all this, transcendental experience cannot simply remain totally inarticulate, but must always seek to be expressed, if always inadequately, in the realm of the categorical. Or to put it differently, we must always try to express our transcendental experience. The expression can take place in language – in philosophy or poetry – or through other means – art, music, religious symbols and actions.3 The attempt to articulate always in some way fails – the articulation can never be adequate to the original experience. But the attempt must nevertheless always be made. Furthermore, the attempt itself is important. The very expression of the experience, Rahner maintains, is always a shaping moment in the experience: what is experienced is partly determined by how this experience is expressed.

 Kilby, Karen (2005-04-19). The SPCK Introduction to Karl Rahner (Kindle Locations 336-355). Perseus Books Group. Kindle Edition. 


Sunday, September 2, 2012

Ate The Wordless Proclamation Today

Worshipped with my Son, Daughter-in-law and precious granddaughter Alice today. I was reminded of my writing about "The Wordless Proclamation" as I partook of the Eucharist. It was so meaningful in light of my recent ramblings. I truly felt I could receive it with integrity. I was able to perform Gassho with greater awareness of reverence than ever before.

Bon Appetit!


Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Grandmother Mind

In my home I'm the one who is always reading about the spiritual life. I'm the one who tries to maintain my zazen practice in an honorable way. I'm the one always wanting to have deep discussions about life, about death, about what matters. I'm the one who loves to write about these matters on this blog. I'm the one who wants to know what it means to actualize this spiritual life, right now, in this moment.

Then there is Susan Moon:

Parents must worry about all the nuts and bolts of their children's care,
but grandmothers, says Susan Moon, can reflect on everything in the background---the water, air, stories, and love. It seems to me that this "grandmother mind" is exactly what the world needs more of.
taken from The Best Buddhist Writing 2008
Grandmother Mind by Susan Moon, pg.247

Then there is Eihei Dogen:
You can understand all of Buddhism, but you cannot go beyond your abilities and your intelligence unless you have robai-shin, grandmother mind, the mind of great compassion

Then there's my wife, Laurie, affectionately known as Lala by our granddaughters.

This afternoon she came home all excited about the blocks and books she had bought for our youngest granddaughter Alice.

I would have come home showing her some new book, new shirt, new pantS or something like that, which I had bought for myself.



Maybe it's time to burn all my books and just watch my wife.



Sunday, August 19, 2012

David Whyte and Me


Good poetry begins with the lightest touch, 

a breeze arriving from nowhere,

a whispered healing arrival,

a word in your ear, a settling into things,

 then, like a hand in the dark, it arrests the whole body, 

steeling you for revelation. 

In the silence that follows a great line, 

you can feel Lazarus, 

deep inside even the laziest, most deathly afraid part of you, 

lift up his hands and walk toward the light.

Whyte, David (2007-01-01). River Flow: New & Selected Poems (p. 136). Many Rivers Press. Kindle Edition.

I shared this with my youngest granddaughter on her blog this morning.
This whole poem speaks to me of waking up to intimacy. Waking up to that which is closer to you than you are to yourself.

Aliving (my made up word, the "i" is the long "i") what was dead, revealing the ground of being in all of us.

Yes, I think good poems can do that.

Poem As Ground of Being

Poem be my ground,
O sacred arrangements of words,
Images from letters of old,
Pointing to the moon,
The moon of realization.
We are then one.



Sunday, August 12, 2012

Seamless Life

A Seamless Life
(photography by Jason Faulkner)
Thanks Son.
Every moment devoted to this practice—this is what Wumen asks of us. What kind of a life can we lead if we are truly digging into our practice day and night? This is the life of one fabric, perhaps not yet realized, but enacted. We are instructed to do what we can’t yet experience. Like St. Paul’s “pray without ceasing,” our devotion to practice prepares the ground for a seamless life.

Blacker, Melissa; Ford, James Ishmael (2011-03-17). The Book of Mu: Essential Writings on Zen's Most Important Koan (p. 147). Perseus Books Group. Kindle Edition. 

What does a seamless life look like?


Just This

For subtle realization, it is of the utmost importance that you cut off the mind road.  
 It is easy to misunderstand the phrase “cut off the mind road.” Wumen is not asking us to stop having thoughts, but to stop following them. To stop following thoughts resembles Dogen’s advice: “to study the self is to forget the self.” When we forget the self we stop putting a construction we call the self at the center of our lives. Similarly, when we watch the pattern of thoughts that arise moment after moment we can follow them to their origins, which turn out to be nothing more than fantasies, constructions of the mind. 
Seeing through these fantasies and constructions, we discover a world beyond thought, in which rain is only rain, not words or stories about rain. We come back to our true life, our true self. 
The “subtle realization” that Wumen mentions here is nothing more than this recognition of our naked, unborn self, alive to this moment, alive to the world as it is, not as we think or construct it to be. This smell, this taste, this touch, sight, sound (with no description in the way), this life, in this moment, and we along with it—perfect and complete.  

Blacker, Melissa; Ford, James Ishmael (2011-03-17). The Book of Mu: Essential Writings on Zen's Most Important Koan (p. 144). Perseus Books Group. Kindle Edition. 



Saturday, August 4, 2012


I want to continue my thoughts about this wordless proclamation as a way of my thinking through this integrative process I am speaking about. I may not be understanding it in the way it was spoken of in the context I found it but it has still stimulated some thought for me. So, as a way of thinking through this:

Maybe integration is the wrong term. Or maybe integration can only be used from a relative position cognitively. Anything of the Truth would not be bringing something together, it would be realizing the seamlessness of it. So when I say integrate, I think I am speaking only from a relative perspective, lacking the experience of realizing. Truly not everything that Buddhism speaks of can be integrated with Christianity. But TRUTH is already the same, no need for integration. So when we come to two different fingers that are pointing to the same moon, it's the labels and concepts (the fingers) that make us think integration is needed. 

Upon the experience of a "wordless proclamation" all is realized. So one way of integrating in the relative is to become a WORDLESS PROCLAMATION. Would this not be actualizing this seamless truth? We only stick out the pointing fingers when needed as a way of directing, explaining. This points to the truth about why it is wrong to talk about zen, while at the same time being necessary.

We all have the potential to actualize our being Wordless Proclamations coming from the same unborn nature, from what Thomas Merton calls that "virgin point", we are all a word with the potential to be fleshed.

So for me now, in TRUTH, there is nothing to integrate. There is only something to realize. There is only this seamless truth. My naming only creates seams but we all need a place to belong in the conceptual world. It' like looking at a map with all those borders, those seams. But we all know that those borders, those seams are not real, only made up so as to create some kind of order. Some structure maybe? Who knows.

Remove all those borders and what do your have?

A Seamless Proclamation!

At least that is as much as I can say about it at the moment. At any given time I am open to all this changing!


Friday, August 3, 2012

We Are A Wordless Proclamation

One time when Zen master Seung Sahn asked his student a question, the student answered, “One.” Seung Sahn said to the student, “Where does this ‘One’ return to?” Even the One has to return somewhere. The student replied, “I don’t know.” Seung Sahn smiled at her and said, “Only don’t know—wonderful!”
 It’s the same with the unborn; you can’t define it, you can’t grasp it, but it is to be realized. We long for this. The birth of the Buddha is about the proclamation of the unborn. If it’s unborn, it means it can’t die, because it never was created. When the temporal body of a great teacher dies, there is still this eternal life that continues aeon after aeon, or kalpa after kalpa, beyond space and time. Realized or not, this is the case because there is no beginning and no end. It is the same when ordinary people die; there is the same eternal life because eternal life is the no-mind, or unborn, this infinite spaciousness and great peace that we cannot define because it is not limited by any conditions. Some of you may have experienced this by being with those who have died. It is neither here nor there, big nor small, female nor male, neither living nor dead. It’s beyond words. That’s what it means to be a wordless proclamation. We can’t say anything about it. But that’s also why it’s great. (Great means “no beginning, no end.”) We should know that we are inherently endowed with this greatness. This is what the proclamation of the birth of Buddha is all about. Real practice is the realization of this. That’s our celebration.

Roshi, Jakusho Kwong (2007-12-18). No Beginning, No End: The Intimate Heart of Zen (p. 230). Random House, Inc.. Kindle Edition. 

Was the birth of Jesus about the proclamation of the unborn?

Story of the Word John 1

In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God. 2The Word was with God in the beginning. 3Everything came into being through the Word, and without the Word nothing came into being. What came into being 4through the Word was life,a and the life was the light for all people. 5The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness doesn't extinguish the light.

6A man named John was sent from God. 7He came as a witness to testify concerning the light, so that through him everyone would believe in the light. 8He himself wasn't the light, but his mission was to testify concerning the light. 9The true light that shines on all people was coming into the world. 10The light was in the world, and the world came into being through the light, but the world didn't recognize the light. 11The light came to his own people, and his own people didn't welcome him. 12But those who did welcome him, those who believed in his name, he authorized to become God's children,
 13born not from blood from human desire or passion, but born from God. 14The Word became flesh and made his home among us.

Common English Bible (2011-06-15). CEB Common English Bible (Kindle Locations 49991-50002). Abingdon Press. Kindle Edition.  Locations 49979-49990). Abingdon Press. Kindle Edition.

Seems this past year I have spent a lot of time trying to integrate much of Buddhist thought with Christian theology.

Reading this past week from No Beginning, No End: The Intimate Heart of Zen, I came across this "wordless proclamation". Then I started thinking about this word becoming flesh thing. Then I started thinking about realizing and actualizing. Then I started thinking about the "I am the way, the truth and the life", then I started thinking about mind and body and embodiment.

None of this probably makes any sense to anyone but me right now but I had to write it out.


Sunday, July 29, 2012


I continue my inward journey and my outward life (but not two), wondering when the inward will penetrate the thin skin of my spirit and be incarnated into my flesh and become my body, my mind, my breath, my life. "They" speak of a gateless gate, so one would think (and there's part of the problem) that there is nothing to penetrate, nothing to break through. Only something to realize and then actualize. 

Mumbo jumbo! Words! Thoughts! Ideas! Concepts!

Shut up!
Sit down!
Quit thinking!
Quit Seeing!
Quit smelling!
Quit tasting!
Quit Feeling!

Stand up!

Wake Up!

To what?

Probably absolutely nothing new.

Just closer to "it" than ever before.

But I have always been close to "it".

Just aware, that's all.